Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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