I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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