I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
