i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
