if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
The feeling are messing with the penis
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
