I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Randomize
