Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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