I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
