Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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