are you still at the devil's house?
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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