you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
She's not a foreskin expert like you
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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