First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Drake has all the answers
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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