: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
