i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Randomize
