the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
