I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
