yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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