tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
