"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
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