Porn is love you can see.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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