Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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