Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
