Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I will be naked everywhere
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize