He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
