already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
