Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
