i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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