oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
id be glad to
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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