Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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