Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
