oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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