it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Damn victory sex feels great
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
why is half of my head shaved?
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