So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
