I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
