I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize
