What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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