please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
