so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize