He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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