am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
