you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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