it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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