You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
