the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
