I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
