Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
operation harelip BJ is a go
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
