She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
