About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
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