Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
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