I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
