And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
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