just survived the first fart of the relationship.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Randomize