She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize